Saturday, December 26, 2009


Think of me in my Pyjama, Sleepers n Muffler(*after a whole night journey, then a messed up sleep*)...

You will say: Hey Dude.. Look at you Man. You look awesome in this N-F-N outfit.(*Not Fit for Night-Out*).. Go to bed now..


Dude Don’t want to sleep Tonight.. Dude wants to go to the Mall & Just Chill-Chill...

So Dude[1] picked up his friend Dude[2] for his FUN RIDE...

Now DUDES were ready to rock ‘n’ roll... (*Without their ‘Numero Uno/ Woodland/KOUTONS/FCUK’ on*)

They went to THE PVS MALL to play this little GAME ov GOD ‘L-A-G’ (Look-Appreciate-Go)

How to play?


Step 1: Look around for the GOD’s Work

Step 2: Categorize it as Made in China/Made in India/Made in heaven

Step 3: Appreciate it n Go Away.. Then goto Step 1 or Exit.

Rule 1: Do not try to touch or talk. You are just a Passer-By. Keep Distance. Play Safe.


It is a GOD’s game... So we play..

But what if you break any rules???

Ab vo toh todkar hi pata chalega naa.. Chalo aaj rules todkar kheltey hain...


Player 1 : DUDE[1]_ Power : G-F-N(*Good For Nothing* aka NULLA)

Player 2 : DUDE[2]_ Power : Play Guitar


Three chicks at Barista... Posing ‘N’ Clicking with guitar... :P

Normal Zindagi: Look, Smile n Go Away.

Mentos Zindagi: Break the rules.. Go Talk to them.

So we went to them & DUDE[2] used his power here...

He asked “Do you mind If we join you n play some Guitar”

Background mei I was preparing myself for playback singing. :P (*Ab sala game mei rehne ke liye kuch toh karna padta na yaar*) tabhi mujhe yaad aaya ki jab Kos-Kos door koi bachha rota hai toh uski Maa SENTI hokar bolti hai “Beta Soja nai toh vo PLAYBACK SINGER PAPPU jag jayega or agar vo jag gaya toh tu zindagi bhar ni so Payega..”

Ye yaad aatey hi meine uss Maa-Bete ke khatir apna Playback Singing ka idea drop kar diya.

I decided ki i will do the RJ job only... like Unke Favourites, dost se bajvaunga... :P

They offered us some Chocolate Pie or something... We were like “No Thanks..”.. we only play guitar for lonely chicks like you.

Stage was set for Rock ‘n’ Roll... DUDE[2] was TUNING the Guitar & DUDE[1] was preparing the list of his favourites in case if they asked for his opinion...

Everything was going just fine... Lekin hum bhool gaye they ki hum rules todkar game khel rae they...

Ab GOD ke game mei GOD se panga loge toh BAND toh bajega naa..

So BAND baja... lekin vo BAND humne nai... Bhagwan ne humara bajaya..


TUNING karte-karte awaz aayi.. TUKKKKK n Everyone was like WHAT THE FUKKKK??

Toota Toota ek Taar aise Toota ki fir jud na Paaya... :)

So guys Guitar ka Toot gaya... String.

Awkward Situation : We returned the Guitar to the Barista guy.. He took it with a *khaya-piya kuch nai, Guitar todkar pakda gaye* Look. Now there was no point of sitting there without Guitar.

So we wished them Merry Christmas n Kut Liye...

Tab hum Dudes ke andar ka zameer jaga...(*kaafi late jaga but jaag gaya*)

Humne Socha “Nahi yar. Yahan aaye hain toh kuch Pee-kar ke jayengey.”(*Not English wala PEE... Matlab badal jayega* :P)

Jeb mei rokda nai tha.. lekin still zameer jaga hua tha so DUDE[1] took out his dad’s debit card & ordered two cappuccino..

Fir dono Dudes ne unn bandiyon ke samne wali table ke sath padi chairs par baithkar shan se Coffee pee & socha agar Game ke rules na todey hotey toh abi BHEEGI BILLI KI TARAH COFFEE NI PEE RAE HOTE BALKI DUDE BANE GHOOM RAHE HOTEY. :|

Anyways.. It was me DUDE[1] reporting live from My Home..

Iss post ke prayojak they MENTOS... *Game Ki Lanka Laga Dey...* :?


Watch 3 Idiots... Mast n Must Watch...

Notice the Character of Raju Rastogi played by Sharman Joshi...

3 Similarities:

1. Surname 2. Interview Scene(*Though i was not selected*) 3. He writes Blog

Monday, December 21, 2009

Fuck It, Forget It...

Please don’t read it if you have any problem with proper ‘hindi wali gaalis’ coz this post is goin to be full of them...

Title: Fuck It, Forget It.

But how?

Gist of the story: Today Infosys came for the placement & I was not selected...

Fuck that.

Minimum eligibility criteria for Infy were 60% in 10th & 12th plus 65% in engineering till 6th sem with no active backlog.
Now I just fulfilled the criteria..
My stats are like: 60.67% in 10th & 63.20% in 12th plus 66.37% in Engineering till now with no RE.
Big Deal. :)

I was fucking eligible to sit for the recruitments.

Now fuck that as well.

It all started with written exam with two sections of Maths & Verbal.

I surprisingly cleared this fucking shit as well. M good with maths but i cheated in this section, no big deal. But i cleared verbal on my own, Big deal Man.

But Fuck that as well.

About Infy, they say you clear the written & placement is all yours. Interview is just a formality.

Here comes the funny part, i fucked with the formality.

According to me, my interview went all well but i was not selected.

Behen-chow what the fuck is that?????

They selected 74 students out of 85 students & i was not one of them.

Now i am like : Infy ki Maa ki C....* Big tym*

Ab saala mann toh karra hai ki poori post hi gaaliyon se bhar doon... coz that is the only thing um good at..

Fuck everything ben-chow that too in proper Hindi...

Maa-chow i dropped twice before i get into this college...

First Drop- saala IIT ka screening nikal gaya but Mains ne meri le li... AIEEE ki rank was 33000 toh wahan bi BC kuch ni milna tha so i dropped again.

Second Drop- IIT ne fir meri le li.. but AIEEE mei 11636 rank aa gayi...

I actually got a fucking full scholarship(for one year) in this collz based on my Rank(2nd topper of my collz)...
But fuck it hard man coz i dun knw why, just fuck it... Does not matter.

Now um sittin here after not facing the guys who got selected just coz they cann’t be happy for themselves coz they r sad for me.
Fuck That Real Hard...

Fags dun help you out in such condition. Holyyyyyyyyyyyy FuuuuuuuuCCCKKKKKKKK.

Soch ke baitha tha ki pata ni kya-kya likhunga but nahi aa ra saala bahar...

Maa-chow i feel like crying lekin you can’t do it with people around you...
Fuck this freaking situation...

My bro offered me 5000 bucks plus I-pod just to make me feel good....
Fuck It AGAIN but not so hard...


Oh GOD!!!! :(