My Life Through My Eyes [Extended Version]

Hi...

This is me reporting live somewhere from Chandigarh.

You know I have been thinking about my life lately... More than ever...

I have been thinking about my life and how it has become more and more sad & gloomy, even after I have got everything I was destined for, I guess.

Let’s rewind my story... You know even I need to rewind my life to check from where it all began.


School Life: [Till 2004]

I am from Meerut (U.P.), city located near Delhi.

I was an (below) average child. I never did my homework.

I was good for nothing, and I mean it literally.

I was always scared of the shit my teachers gonna give me each and every day for me being not so particular with my studies and homework.

Every night I used to calculate the number of periods I'll be getting my ass whooped next day on the scale of 8 periods. Then i used to pray God ‘kindly save me this year’ and i promise I will be regular from the next session at school.

I will complete all my homework from day 1.

But I never kept the promise and so even God started rejecting my prayers too.

Every morning I was scared to death just about thinking of my [would-be] ass whooping periods all day long.

This is how it used to be throughout my school life.

I never did my homework. I always got my ass whooped by one or another teacher for the same old reason. THE HOMEOWRK!

My teachers were always pleased to tell me that – I am good for nothing.

Here is a piece how they used to put it :

“Arpit... tumhara kuch nahi ho sakta... or Bak-Bak...thodi si or Bak-Bak...”

And i was like (in back of my mind): “Tere se poocha kisine *beep-beep*??” I don’t want to show any disregard to my honourable teachers so i beeped the interesting part!

Soon enough I was done with my schooling And I did not enjoyed it at all.


Drop Years: [2004-2006]

I dropped twice before i get into any college.

1st Drop Year: I cleared the IIT-Screening test to much of my own surprise!

It was the first time i felt proud of myself. :)

I was not able to crack the Mains though but who cares...

Screening qualified was more than life time achievement for someone like me.

For someone [below average][good for nothing] student like me.

2nd Drop Year: I again failed to get into IIT but somehow i managed to get 11636 rank in AIEEE.

It was not that bad for a student like me.

And for your kind information, I was like in top 4 students of my school who did something of that level.

Oh boy! Wasn’t I feeling top on the world at that moment! :)


College Life: [2006-2010]

July 18th 2006: I Joined Chandigarh College of Engineering & Technology, Govt College. [Namesake]

It was the time of life when i left my schooling much behind in the streets of Meerut.

I was here to start afresh.

For all those weird relatives/well-wishers/padosi back in Meerut :

1st I was in Chandigarh. [The City Beautiful]

2nd I was pursuing engineering from a govt college. [To shut the fucking mouth of all the relatives or well wishers of that sort]

And if above two facts were not enough,

3rd My stream was computer science.

[Believe me it’s a dreamy trio for someone like me, you know [below average] [good for nothing] student]

So, any of my well wishers never actually tried to fuck me up at any point of time during my college days.

Though my Uncle tried it once or twice asking me if my college is in main Chandigarh or whether it is in some remote area near Chandigarh, But i kept my calm & asked him to come and visit me sometime & i will show him which place i live in and which bar i visit on weekends... #fuckingbastard.

Anyways,

As you have noticed that i was living the life of my dream (maybe better), But there was something troubling me inside.

What I mean is that though i was mean to the world outside & i declared myself to be living the better life than they ever thought of, but there was something missing from inside.

Satisfaction... it was!

I was not satisfied with my achievements. No Sir.

Because what I achieved was not something I wanted to achieve for myself.

I did it all because I wanted to prove it to the fucking world outside and somehow I got lucky enough to fool them.

[As the matter of fact I did not even studied in the drop years as well, it was all luck that my mind was capable of doing all those sums without much effort]

You can fool the world outside but you can’t fool YOU inside.

I was not satisfied for the reason that I disgraced study throughout my life.

And after all of this, all the achievements & everything I have to tell the world outside was just because of my study, which was not even the last thing I would do in this world *if not forced*.

Then it happened to me like a miracle.

I become the integral part of The Dram-e-baaZ [Dramatics Club].

In fact we guys build that club out nowhere. All credit goes to Sohrab Khandelwal.

[He was kind of guardian angle to me]

We believed in him and that faith kept us all going and eventually we become the best club of the college in no time. :)

Dram-E-baaZ brought the peace in my life.

For once I had something beyond study to talk about myself.

For once I was in the News Papers like all other bright kids.

For once I was the chosen one.

For once the boy was shining, you know the [below average][good for nothing] fellow... don’t you? ;)

It was something i was made for.

And at that time i found my second love as well.

Something else i was made for.

DrameBaazi being the first one.

Can you name the next love??

Well it was blogging.

I started blogging on March 22 2009, the very same day i was in news papers because of our street play performance.

And it felt awesome.

Now I had all the things to talk about other than study.

And for a change I was quite good with both of them.

I was a true Dram-E-Baaz and a very true Blogger from my heart and soul.

I was enjoying it, celebrating it...

But it all ended very soon...

I was done with my college life and I loved every part of it.

It gave my life some motto. I was ready to take on the world.


Professional Life: [Since 2010 till Present]

I joined a company in Chandigarh only.

That way I stayed close to the place, once I lived my college life.

But it was different this time. There was no DrameBaazi now.

And the blogging was not enough for me.

I soon fell in love with the girl from the same company. [READ]

But she was in no mood for falling for me.

So it was only me who fell. :P

Did I tell you that falling alone hurts so much that you become The Dev-D kind of fella...

And I was no exception either... :D

Not-So-Soon enough she shifted somewhere else & I somehow managed to forgot her after listening to the song ‘Tujhe bhula diya’ infinite number of times.... :) *BTW, wo apki [hone wali]bhabhi ki ringtone thi..* :P

Finally, I moved on...

But there was nothing much left in life. I was super bored of anything.

Then in March 2011, I found my third love.

My love for Photography.

Since then, My blog has become more of a photoblog.

But today I wanted to look over the life once again.

I wanted to tell you guys the story of [below average] [good for nothing] fellow once.

Today I have almost everything I was told to achieve in life.

I have a degree and a decent job, but the only thing is missing.

Happiness... It is!

I go looking for it. It’s nowhere near me.

Maybe that is the price I paid to this world in return of which I got everything I was asked for. :)

Comments

  1. You know I have been thinking about my life lately... More than ever...
    Thats what we have blogs for, Arpit. Good thing you wrote it down.

    I was good for nothing, and I mean it literally.
    We once talked there are two kinds of people: one who don't take any shit, and others who do take it. Unfortunately, most of us come under the second category.

    I will complete all my homework from day 1
    Yeah, me too!

    Satisfaction... it was!
    It was, and it will be, forever. Don't fret too much about it, though.

    Then it happened to me like a miracle.
    No kidding. Not only you, each one of us have our lives as strings of happy coincidences.

    @Sohrab Khandelwal
    Thanks man, for giving our Arpit something to be happy about!

    I wanted to tell you guys the story of [below average] [good for nothing] fellow once.
    There is nothing below average about you man. You are the TL of A-team, and a member of the coveted FPS group.

    I think you have had too much to think. Don't let anything bog you down. Not being satisfied is not a bad thing.(Logical negation: being satisfied is a good thing...some fundamental flaw here, but never mind) At least you know your problem. Acknowledging a problem is the first step in eradicating it. Meet you on (sic) Monday.

    ReplyDelete
  2. That's some journey and some point you made-for someone who called himself as good for nothing...you have come a far, far way and paved such a wonderful path of satisfaction which is often as important as success that ultimately follows:-)

    it's such a well narrated piece of you...so glad to know you better and so glad that i do know you!

    wish u all the very best!
    though one question-woh hone waale bhabhi chale gaye na...and ek tarfa pyar kaise DEV-D ho sakta hain...please apnao that line-patti to patti warna dosre ready:)

    ReplyDelete
  3. success means nothing if there is no satisfaction.. to the world u may seem like a successful person but when u r not satisfied with it u will never feel happy.. you hav written it very well

    nd i want u to know tht u r the best photographer as far as i know.. :) :)
    amazing pics.. :)

    keep blogging.. :) :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. @ Karunesh ::

    Hey buddy. :)
    So good to see your detailed comment.

    I mean you actually inspired me to write after so long.. :)

    I am glad that you are here at first place..

    I hope that you connected to the story! :)

    And yeah.. I am proud of being the TL of A-Team.. & to share the honor of being the member of FPS group! :)

    See you on monday.. K.K.! :)

    Keep Smiling. Keep RockinG! :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. @ Suruchi ::

    Thanks for being so kind with your words. :)
    I am the lucky one, who find a fellow blogger like you. :)

    Thanks for the wishes again.

    haan.. hone wali bhabhi left the company 10 months back..
    & i mentioned Dev-D, just to add lil filmy effect to my situation ! :P

    That's it..

    And i am working on the last part! :D


    Keep Smiling. Keep Writing. :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. @ Holla ::

    Thank you holla. :)
    I ll try to do even better with my camera. :)

    Happy Blogging! :)
    Take Care! :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Honestly Arpit , we all go through this at some or the other point of time in my life. i think you should spend some time with yourself ..doing things you like or may be doing nothing ....it really helps !

    ReplyDelete
  8. hmmm i am glad to have known all the great... bull shit that you have said here :P...


    on a serious note... arpit... it was great to know abt ur childhood.. and everything else that has made you who you are... sometimes its just like that yaar... u cant help it... when u get dont something... you have to live for what u have...

    ask me.. i have everything in my life... a job i like, a girl i love... but stilll something is there that always eludes me... maybe satisfaction... something... i hope to find it someday... and i as a friend i hope u find it too... and i am sure u will

    You are one of the person with w very good heart... and i am sure good tings will keep coming in ur life... including our very beautiful and amazing bhabi... cant wait for that day...

    Till then chill mar... drink a cool beeer and keep on clicking and be happy in what u have... expect low... good things are bound to happen :)

    Take care and keep writing.......

    ReplyDelete
  9. Arpit, things will only get better from here on! I did the same. I was a ziddi child how would sleep by burring her head in the books than study to only teach pushing family a lesson. But who's fault? In the end mine, because I did not care to realize what I wanted in life. Now, I do. But, I am still a coward to ditch what I have and follow my heart completely. Some may say, I did follow my heart, but fully, not yet....

    Peace...and more happiness to you!

    #_#
    The Blunt Blog

    ReplyDelete
  10. @ Viddhi ::

    Hi V.. :)
    You are right, I should stay close to myself and do what i like..
    I did the same by writing a post about me! :)

    I felt good after writing it down! :)

    Thanks for coming! :)

    Take Care!

    ReplyDelete
  11. @ Thousif Raza ::

    Hey bitch!

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me..

    And saale.. even i can't wait for that 'bhabi' day.. I hope it come soon.. :P

    *or tune kaha na ke Chill Marun*
    to i ll kill the chill as soon as i get my hands on it! ;)


    Happy Blogging! Keep Smiling! :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. @ Chintan ::

    Hey.. I kind of realize what i want from life but too afraid to loose what i hv right now! #bullshitJOB :\

    I will try to find the peace & happiness within me..
    But i actually want to do something for little things i am passionate about.. :)

    sahi bataun to yar sab kuch faad ke nikalna chahta hun.. like the way i left for college after school.. :)


    Thanks for sharing lil things about you!
    And i am quite inspired by your photography! :)

    Happy Blogging.. Happy Clicking! ^_^

    ReplyDelete
  13. Nice post :)
    Happiness seems a mystery ... sometimes no reason makes us happy and other times things we dreamed about for ages also doesn't make much difference.. i guess sometimes all u can do is wait for a miracle..:)

    ReplyDelete
  14. @ Smilehoney ::


    Thanks. :)
    And yup i can't wait for the miracle. :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Well said Arpit. Just stumbled upon your blog and recognised you, well to be fair I recognise your brother thats why I did. We were classmates in school. I think you have neatly summed up at least 80% of us wouldn't be an understatement(barring the subtle differences), and thats helluva job. If you replace Draam-e-baaz with a Metal band and bike rides, chandigarh to DU, voila ! the post would be about me. Thanks a lot for writing this, I've just started blogging but rest assured I'm following you.
    P.S. - Seems both of us are shutterbugs too.

    ReplyDelete
  16. @ Manu Bhaiya ::

    Hi Bhaiya..
    Welcome to my blog!!! :)

    I am sure i hv heard of you in my Bachpan Days.. :) :)


    Its always a pleasure to find someone from childhood memories.. Especially on Blogger.. its like a jackpot! :P

    Thanks for such an awesome comment.. :)

    & yup i am a big time shuttebug..
    I would love to see your clicks! :) :)


    Hope to see more of you!

    Happy Blogging! :)

    ReplyDelete
  17. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hi Arpit, I'm sure you wouldn't have heard of me cuz I used to be invisible back then. Nevertheless its great to meet you here and of-course we'll share frequently now. I indeed is great to meet someone from lanes of meerut in web world, and icing on the cake is that you're somehow linked to them, it brings back old memories. Bliss...

    ReplyDelete
  19. We always go looking for happiness in big things like an awesome job, a degree, a decent paycheck, but its actually the little things, in ur case. draamebaaz and photography, that end up giving you more happiness than the degree or job!

    keep going buddy!
    Nice reading all ur posts!
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. @ Isha ::

    Yup.. Sahi baat to ye hai ki Happiness Lies Within! :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. o paaji !!!
    Its high time you write an Autobiography !!

    It will be a bestseller !!!

    Well that was an honest account of your life !!!

    Somewhere I too felt connected with this story !!

    Well buddy Happiness is nothing but satisfaction,
    satisfaction of following your mind and heart together !!!

    Try it and Happiness will be at an arm's distance !!!

    Happy Blogging and take care !!!

    ReplyDelete

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